care more than some think is wise; risk more than some think is safe;
dream more than some think is practical; expect more than some think is possible


Two things today:

1) Be a man!
- I say this, because of some stuff I have been dealing with lately. I have not pushed on and toward the light at the end of the tunnel ...rather being bogged down a little (or a lot, at times) in my current struggle. An admonishment from one of my truest brothers in the Lord:

Be watchful, stand firm in the faith, act like MEN, be strong. Let all that you do be done in love (1 Cor 16.13)

- And he followed this with another paraphrased admonishing from Lewis:

The exact circumstances of our situation (including our emotions) are nearly irrelevant; what matters is how we act during those times. All you can do is continue to ACT AS A MAN; to do the things you know to be right even if there's little or no heart behind them.

2) Be a man!
My second issue today is also - BE A MAN. If you have a problem with someone - no matter what the problem is - GO to the person, in person and address the problem you have with them. Don't be a pansy, hiding behind a lie by storing up your irritation and anger, because your too cowardly to confront someone ... or because you think since you have previously addressed this person about the same problems that you can just stop addressing the problem, and rather just treat them like they are less, or talk down to them, or whatever. BE MAN enough to show everyone respect ... not just the ones who deserve it (according to your own judgment). BE MAN enough to respect those who irritate you, or those you don't get along with! I am sick of this pansy-ass lack of confrontation that we put up with!


Listen to this ...

To all my dear friends and family all around, attune your ears to the truth of what the US News & World Report has to say:

(Sunset over Auburn University Turf Unit)

For Southern charm with collegiate vigor, consider Auburn, Ala. This diamond on the eastern Alabama plains has a population of just under 50,000 and is home to Auburn University. On football Saturdays, when die-hard fans arrive in droves to cheer their beloved Tigers, Auburn swells to the state's fifth-most-populous city. And as Auburn's largest employer, the university also plays a starring role in the local economy. (Sunset at Ag Heritage Park)

With mild winters and hot summers, the city offers no shortage of outdoor recreation opportunities. Find a nice hiking trail in the 696-acre Chewacla State Park before cooling off with an afternoon swim. Take a stroll through the Donald E. Davis Arboretum, located on the Auburn University campus.

Golfers can head to nearby Grand National golf course and wind their way through the state along the beautiful Robert Trent Jones Golf Trail. "Once you have been there, you just want to come back," says John Cannon, president of SunBelt Golf Corp., which manages the trail.

What wasn't mentioned is a couple decent mountain bike trails in the Tuskegee National Forest, as well as Auburn's prime proximity to Atlanta for the big city-feel need of some. And of-course, lest I forget, I have yet to mention the bike friendly attitude of the mayor's office. Though we may not have yet been awarded a gold medal for bike friendly lanes ... we have won a bronze medal,from the League of American Bicyclists! I think thats a good start. So, I must admit, after living 5 years in the Loveliest Village on the Plains ... I totally agree with US News and World Report!

Thanks for the Shout Out ... and we will not disappoint!

PS - Those are my pictures!


America, generation ... shut up and get up off your ass

"So go marry someone, provided you're equally yoked and you actually like being with each other. Go get a job, provided it's not wicked. Go live somewhere in something with somebody or nobody. But put aside the passivity and the quest for complete fulfillment and the perfectionism and the preoccupation with the future, and for God's sake start making some decisions in your life. Don't wait for the liver-shiver. If you are seeking first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, you will be in God's will, so just go out and do something." - Kevin DeYoung

I am speechless. Sure, it is awesome quote, in fact it is mind-blowingly awesome, but in a makes my heart of hearts cringe kind of way! So true, it is so true and so good ... it inspires me want to throw off all the crap in my life, to go do something, to take action against whatever it is in that quote that resonates within me, against the world's influence over me. I believe statements of this sort should/do resonate in a believer's heart, echoing to each of us that if we will dive headlong in pursuit, with complete reckless abandon to passionately and intimately love Christ, to seek him and only him, to desire to please Him (ahem, not others!)!!! And THEN, like Kevin says, "We will be in God's will" and wondrous things happen when that is the case ... like two sinners can get married and live in love and in covenant with each other for their entire earthly lives, like glorifying God by commuting daily to a secular job - that is ordinary ... or whatever the "it" is that we might go out and do.

I can hardly describe what I am feeling after having read this. It stirs up so much, that I can barely quantify with words ... Its just that,
So if you cant tell, I am super fired up. I hate passivity, but so often I find myself giving in ... in the little things, & thats where - maybe - it matters most!!! It makes me want to scream!, like the best thing to get out what I can't say with words would to be to go outside and scream for a little while

It has stirred up feelings of passion against what the world shoves at me every day, everything that is so opposite of what God is about! I don't want to be opposite of God ... I want to be opposite of comfort, ease, passivity, being nice (as oppose to truthful).

These feelings of upheaval against the world's gospel (comfort, ease, passivity) - coincide very closely with my own personal opinions and feelings about the "American Dream" and the vastly misguided sense of worth we have fully subscribed to. We have become whores to wealth, temporal happiness in material possessions, and value mindless entertainment & entertainers over those who lay their lives on the line day in day out, ie: Police officers, Firemen, our Soldiers (currently deployed all around the world).

Take for instance: Tonight on the news - and this will vary depending on what news you watch - but what did you hear more about: all this worthless hoopla about John and Kate getting a divorce or the monstrosities and massive death counts piling up in Iran, atrocities committed by the ruling government?

NYT headline read: 'Jon & Kate' Split-Up Draws Record Breaking Audience

Now, I ask, which matters more? Which is worthy of our concern and prayer? ... I rest my case.

p.s. - I hate divorce. Its awful, it cheats love of its true worth, and robs God of the glory he receives when a godly man and woman are married ... reflecting to each other and all those who are watching them throughout life, God's covenant love he graces us with in Christ.



He drew me up from the pit of destruction, out of the miry bog, and set my feet upon a rock, making my steps secure. (Ps 40:2)

I learned this verse today. I don't mean I memorized it ... but I learned it by living life today. At 8 am I was at lab for an aquaculture production course I am taking - basically learning how to manage fish and grow them to fillet size, if you will.

Part of that involves capturing the offspring, called fry - they are less than the width of your pinkie finger. The nearly 20,000 we netted out averaged about 9 mm in length! Which we had to harvest from drained ponds .. which required us to needed crawl into the empty pond.

But the mud! I can hardly describe it. Several times I about lost my shoes to it (and yes I actually had shoes on, not chacos). Several times I nearly fell over, I was often splashed in the face and for that matter all over my body. I must admit ... it was fun! I mean it was hot and hard and new ... but it was fun too.

But the mire, the mud we tried hard to walk around in the other morning ... it made me think of sin, of what it is the Lord has redeemed me from. Sin traps, often knocking us off balance and even more often knocking us over, making us fall. Sin is thick and unmanageable without Christ to reign in us, without the grace of the Father to grow in us holiness. Sin is also nasty and sly. Just like I enjoyed the mud, so sin can be "enjoyable" ... pleasurable and pleasing for a minute, but nasty on the inside. Filthy and gross, darkening the heart and hardening the heart - just as my shoes were caked in mud ... but it just inspired a few thoughts ... and a grateful heart.


scrutiny II

I last asked several questions about the comment:

"The saddest place on earth is the biblical South, where everyone has just enough religion to send them straight to hell!!!" ... A bold statement no doubt.

I posted the quote as my FB status and several people including myself responded. The responses are, well you can see for yourself:

From a friend of mine in Atlanta (Jeffery):

By that same token, you could have said that the saddest place on earth just post-Resurrection was the Jewish nation abroad--with just enough background in the truth to let them feel justified in rejecting Christ. Fortunately for the spread of the gospel, the other side of that coin (both then and now) is that when the Holy Spirit overcomes the "inoculation" of basic beliefs held without true faith, they have a wealth of basic knowledge that proves fertile ground for sanctification and understanding the things of God.
From a friend of mine in Auburn (Amber):
I like both this status and the above comment. (I can't "like" the comment, so I have to clarify that my thumbs up goes to both.)
From me:
Jeffery, that is one incredible answer ... one I would have never developed in my own simple mind/heart ... and is very true and insightful. The context I heard the statement in was a preacher asking/begging his congregation to be really - brutally - honest with themselves - to quit playing/toying with Christianity, & subsequently Christ too - and to evaluate & self examine, asking "Is Jesus Christ truly everything to me?!" The question I posted flowed logically from his series of questioning. And he is a preacher in the SE US. Nevertheless, both situations - true & heart-breaking over the current status of countless souls lost - are indeed the "saddest" ... because I would argue, the "lostness" within both groups here discussed brings a kind of sorrow that only God can feel over his strayed creation, a sorrow I would never attempt to describe.... So, lets be mindful and pray for workers for the harvest!
I would love to get some more feedback on this statement. Feedback and interaction helps us all to think deeper, clearer, and more honestly. So, lets hear it!


this demands scrutiny

I just listened to a 10 minute excerpt of a sermon entitled, "Jesus Christ is Everything."

It was one of the more in your face, bold & blunt, proclamations of the truth and necessity of treasuring Christ I have ever heard. I truly think it would offend very many people ... but I truly believe he is dead on the mark, say ...

"The saddest place on earth is the biblical South, where everyone has just enough religion to send them straight to hell!!!"

That is intense. That is bold. That is sweeping and brutally blunt.

Is it true?
- a question worth considering with all of your being -

If it is
true, what are the consequences of it?
  • The reality behind this statement - if true - is one of desperation. If in the south - so many people - have just enough faith to be moral, yet godless people, and they are destined for hell ... then I would say the situation calls for immediate action, on behalf of those who do truly know Christ for the sake of those who are as Pharisees. It means people are deceived, thinking they are following God, when in reality He will proclaim on that Day, "Not everyone who says to me, 'Lord, Lord,' will enter the kingdom of heaven, but the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. On that day many will say to me, 'Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and cast out demons in your name, and do many mighty works in your name?' And then will I declare to them, 'I never knew you; depart from me, you workers of lawlessness.' (Matt 7:21-23). If his assumption and assessment of the religious South is correct, then the stakes could never be higher!

If its not true, why would he say that, what gives him the confidence to make such a claim?
  • If his bold statement is not true, then he (in my own opinion and guess) probably derived that statement by looking at the subculture of Christianity in the South - which we all know exists in full force! We all must admit that at one point in time - maybe still do - go to church 'cause "I am suppose to." and because "Thats what I did growing up." This may be the case - in fact it is the case. So may be ...
Either way, I believe a lot needs to happen in the Church today, so that in our mediocre hearts of worship, we will stop robbing God of the glory and honor due his name, like we do in Sunday morning worship when we sing, checking the clock, thinking of the best restaurant for lunch, falling asleep, or whatever it is that steals His honor from Him.

Whatever happened to the Lion of Christ? The one who slew death? Who defeated sin? Is this not exciting, awe inspiring, and mind blowing. Can we really sit in the pew, not being moved by thinking that the perfect spotless Lamb of God was slain yso that we might say, "
Bless the LORD, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits, who forgives all your iniquity, who heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit, who crowns you with steadfast love and mercy, who satisfies you with good so that your youth is renewed like the eagles." (Ps 103:2-5). How can we be confronted with these realities and not be weeping in joy, not be desperately longing that all peoples would know and worship him too!

Not to put any bias into this, but I agree with the statement, wholeheartedly. Which I regret.



So, the title of my blog has to do with being a fool for Jesus, which I am and always will be!

But today, is about being a different kind of fool ... a fool for chocolate!!! 'Cause I don't know about you, but I love and always have loved chocolate, a lot! Furthermore, I will unashamedly admit, I love chocolate as much as a woman may, as if I were a chocoholic!!! I am unashamedly in love with this most delectable of treats.

A few minutes ago, I received the following email:

Subject: "5 Minute Personal Chocolate Cake" ... being hooked immediately!!!

The recipe:

  • 4 tbs flour
  • 4 tbs sugar
  • 2 tbs cocoa
  • 1 egg
  • 3 tbs milk
  • 3 tbs oil
  • 3 tbs chocolate chips - **note: original recipe calls for this to be 'optional' in this revised version this ingredient is mandatory.**
  • Small splash of vanilla extract
**Cake pictured above is not cake described in recipe**

  1. Add dry ingrients into a coffee mug, mixing well
  2. Pour in milk and oil, mix well
  3. Add chocolate chips and vanilla, mix well
  4. Place mug in microwave, zap on high for 3 minutes (1000 watts or higher)
  5. Allow to cool, dump onto plate, adding vanilla ice cream
  6. Eat (recipe can serve two, if you want to fill slightly more virtuous) - Nope, not gonna happen!!!
Now, chocolate cake is only 5 minutes away, day or night!!


News Anchor Fail

psalm 37

The righteous man:
  1. trusts the Lord
  2. has good intentions
  3. cultivate faithfulness by feasting on God's faithfulness
  4. delights in God
  5. is committed to God's ways
  6. rests in God
  7. waits patiently in the Lord
  8. ceases from anger
  9. forsakes wrath
  10. is humble
  11. is gracious
  12. freely gives and lends to others
  13. speaks wisdom
  14. speaks justice
  15. waits for the Lord
  16. keeps God's ways
  17. is peaceful
  18. is strong in God
  19. has descendants who are a blessing
  20. keeps God's law in his heart
  21. is blameless
  22. is upright
  23. will have a future
  24. and takes his refuge in God
That's amazing ... and I have a long way to go ... but, with these the Lord offers numerous promises, due the man's righteous ways:
  1. He will give him the desires of his heart
  2. He will bring forth his righteousness
  3. the man will inherit the land
  4. He will delight him with abundant posterity
  5. Blesses the righteous man
  6. He never forsakes him, but preserves him
  7. He exalts the righteous man
  8. God saves him
  9. God strengthens him
  10. and God helps and delivers the righteous man


owned ...

I feel, for the first time in my life I can honestly say I know what it means to not be my own.

I mean, yes I belong to Christ, and I am his ... but that doesn't mean I always let him have all of me. Actually, I would say whether or not I know it, I probably don't let him have all of me any of the time. Sad day.

But as of yesterday, my life was taken from me.

Who, you ask, took my life? THESIS, TILAPIA, PLANTS, COURSE REQUIREMENTS, RESEARCH or collectively ... GRADUATE SCHOOL!!!

I literally, yesterday, had my life taken from me as I had explained to me what all must happen this summer in order that I graduate in December. And trust me, I AM GOING TO GRADUATE IN DECEMBER!!! Trust me. But it wont come easy.

Let this be a word of enlightenment to those who think graduate school is "more college" - its not. It is far from it. Try, its like a job ... but worse because it follows you everywhere, to home at the end of the day, to bed a night, to the shower in the morning ... back to the office after supper, etc ... you get my point. Don't get a 2nd degree if you are not ready to work. Of course, I can only speak for my individual degree.

Anyway, I wish I could feel as owned by Christ as I do by grad school, currently. Of course, its not a good feeling I have, so maybe I don't want to feel this way under Christ. His ownership is one of love, overflowing with gospel goodness.

That is why I am claiming, "Though my life be owned by grad school ... my heart belongs to Christ."

I will not put my hope in how "good" or "bad" grad school is, or how"busy" or "difficult" it is. It will work out to Christ's glory in the end, and that the best in my mind.

Good night. 6 am is coming quickly.


face to face it

1) the need: water
2) the need: food
3) the NEED: Jesus, the Living Water and Bread of Life
From Drop Box

Its time to face it, face to face. The world around us is depending on us, the Church, yet without knowing it, for us to come to their rescue, in the name of Jesus, in ways that allow his love to be felt - physical, tangible, and real acts of love that make a difference ... no longer can we sit back and wait ... I want to act ... and oh to be able to GO so that I might be one of the many who have had the greatest honor of all ... to speak the name of Jesus to world that so desperately needs, yea wants Him.

Priorities need to be adjusted. We need a drastic shift, back to reality ... the reality, that reality is not a surplus, but for 99% of the world's population, a lack is the reality.

I am so guilty. Tonight I was griping cause I did not want to cook, didnt know what to choose, etc ... stupid stuff like that, while the world around me is drowning in hunger and in thirst, and dying without ever having been told of God's love for them.

I am ready to face it.


thorn in the flesh ... again

Yesterday I wrote about - or rather asked about the thorn in Paul's flesh. Not what it is, but how did he - and subsequently you and I - how are we to be glad in our weaknesses so that the power of Christ Jesus may rest upon us? This to the glory of God the Father.

I mentioned all my "conditions" as some people like to call them saying, "God has placed along the span of my 23 years of life, a fair degree of hardship most people don't ever have to deal with ... even now if I am healthy (and I am) ... all the issues are still there, and it is something I can share and boast about to the glory of the Father ... but this still doesn't seem quite like the same thing as being weak and having the power of Christ resting upon you. Or is it?"

I now sit back and reflect about last night. In some short conversation with Zeke, my roommate, the question(s) I posed came up. Then I said something without even thinking ... and it was the ANSWER to my question, "Or is it?".

Is having CF, diabetes, and having had a double lung transplant a of weakness in my life, allowed by the hand of God, so that in these multiple weaknesses I can experience the power of Christ upon me, to the glory of the Father?

YES, IT IS!!! I shall then "boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses , so that the power of Christ may dwell upon me!!!"

Now I need to learn, and learning comes by hearing the Word of God, by meditating and listening to the Holy Spirit. I need to learn again how to use my health issues for the glory of God, to boast in them.

I need to grow so that I too can say with Paul, "For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong."

Oh to never be content in comfort and ease!


high stakes or painful stakes?

The answer is painful stakes.

The question?

Its regarding the stake or thorn that was "buried" in Paul the Apostle's side. I call it a stake because, from my readings this morning I learned, the original Greek word means a 'stake,' carrying the connotation of a stake people often die on, though not the same as the stake at which many people have been burned to death.

I don't know what the thorn in Paul's side was, and I don't know that I really want to know ... cause it allows me to apply this to many areas of my life, where I feel as though I have a type of thorn in my side. I will mention, be it a physical pain or ailment he suffered or strictly some internal struggle that the great apostle battled ... it was for sure "a messenger of Satan."

That is, God the Father allowed Satan to assail Paul, just as He did with Job. Paul's suffering held a 2 fold purpose: a) to keep him from boasting and inflating himself by recollecting the revelation of unutterable words he heard and those things which he saw, as Christ called him up to the third heaven, either in or out of body - we know not, but God knows and b) to cause Paul to still continue to glorify God in this life - and this involves so many avenues of Paul's life ... things like his sanctification through sufferings,etc ... . Also, some say he was allowed this totally unique revelation to provide him the hope he would need in light of all that he was called to suffer for the sake of Christ's name.

Anyway, he goes on to say - and we all know it - that as he pleaded the thorn away, God replied, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Paul's response? "Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong."

WHAT? He must be crazy!! WHAT ON EARTH, HOW DOES HE CHANGE SO QUICKLY? From pleading its removal, to not only accepting it, but joyfully accepting it. That's insane!!!

I don't know how to do this. And yes, I truly believe - rather it must be - an acceptance by the Lord's grace working in one's heart. But, I want to be able to worship and boast in all my weaknesses so that, just as Paul says, "so that the power of Christ may rest upon me... ."

The funny thing is, that as I was reading and thinking about this passage this morning, I had one of the worst migraines I have ever had. I mean - no walking, no light, no sleeping, no nothing that didn't make me feel like I would roll over and die if it started hurting more. It was MISERABLE. And that's the attitude I had. I felt miserable ... so I would be miserable.

Isn't that how it goes?

I want to know what it means to glady boast in weakness - to embrace weakness. What's it look like? How do you do it? Does it mean you just don't complain? Does it mean you tell everyone who horrible things in your life are, and then tell them you are grateful for them for you know that God moves in weakness? - This last question, is me as a cynic. I don't believe that is correct at all. My point is, I don't know what it means, and I want to.

God has placed along the span of my 23 years of life, a fair degree of hardship most people don't ever have to deal with ... even now if I am healthy (and I am) ... all the issues are still there, and it is something I can share and boast about to the glory of the Father ... but this still doesn't seem quite like the same thing as being weak and having the power of Christ resting upon you. Or is it?

If anyone has feedback, I would love to hear your thoughts.

This is the end, since I don't really have any real conclusion.